A Good Day
It's been a really good day today. I felt productive today, working with the plants, getting a few groceries, tidying up, ---keeping busy.
Maybe the best part was spending some time with art this evening. Notice it's not Art, --it's my art. I was working with pastels, drawing barns. I've been asked to draw a couple of barns in pastel and now that I've thought it through, I was finally able to work on it. I seem to have to think about it for a while before I get to work on it.
My first barn wasn't quite what the woman wanted, but the more I look at it, the more I like it myself. I may be able to use it in the Spring Art Show. It feautres a barn set in the background and two lovely maples dominate the forground. I suspected that perhaps this wasn't really what my friend wanted. She wants the barn to be more prominent.
Now the barn I worked on tonight is surely what she really wants. It's a weathered old barn, done as a 5X7 picture. I like it a lot, too, but no doubt I'm not objective. Tomorrow when the daylight is full, I can put the finishing touches on this picture and then I can get the second picture done soon.
It's been a good day.
Tending the Plants
This afternoon I took a long hard look at some of the plants in my living room and decided that I must give them some help. I've known for several weeks now that the Jerusalem cherry, which had grown into a beautiful plant and even had several "cherries" on it, has aphids! Oh, no! Two problems here: I didn't want to lose the plant, and I don't want the aphids to spread to other plants. Today I cut the plant down to the soil. I've done this a couple of times in the past and it's grown back into a healthy plant again. I'm hoping that it will happen another time.
One begonia had seen much better days so I tossed it out on a compost heap. I have major surgery planned for a Moses-in-the-bullrushes plant which has become too leggy. I'll cut it off tomorrow and reroot it. I hated to take this action with the plants, but already I see how much better the room looks with these plant changes made. February is a good time to begin to spruce up the plants for Spring.
Lights Out
Today at Auqarobics I found out what happens if the lights go out while we are in the pool. From time to time, I've thought about this because there's no natural light in that area. I saw that there are emergency lights all around the room so, I knew that there was a back up system, but still I wondered what it would be like. Today I found out.
At first the ventilation shut down. It is so noisy that we were all a little relieved when it shut down. It was so quiet. We could hear our instructor without her shouting. We knew it was temporary so it was OK. We do, after all, really need the ventilation. It came back on for a while and our quiet was gone.
But then in a few minutes, the ventilation was off again and then the lights blinked out. All the little back up lights came on instantly and though it was dim light, it was adequate. When the electric came back on, the halogyn lights didn't come on but we had enough light from the hallway and a few auxiliary lights in the room itself. We didn't know what had happened to the electricity.
At home, I discovered that some of our electrical circuits had blinked off for a short time, but it seems that not everything was affected. I wonder what happened this morning to make our electricity blink out for a few seconds.
Easter Eggs
Friday evening I finally got out my Ukrainian Easter egg tools and dyes and started to work on Pysanky eggs again. I have only worked on one egg so far, but it's a start. I did a design with only one dye bath, purple. Tonight I wiped the wax off the egg and now my egg is purple with a white design. The lines are pretty good, even though I haven't practiced the lines for probably more than 8 months. I did get mixed up and made lines in a triangle where I had intended to keep the solid color, but all in all, it's a good egg! I am pleased.
Homemade Cocoa
I just had a cuppa home made cocoa, --you know, starting with cocoa powder, adding sugar, stirring it up with several tablespoons of canned milk and adding the boiling water. I also added about 1/4 teaspoon instant coffee for a very mild coffee flavor. I haven't made cocoa like this for a long, long time. It was really good and made me wonder why I have resorted to the packets of instant cocoa. But of course I know the answer to that. The cocoa mix takes much less time and much less effort.
Coughing
There is sickness all around our community, as I'm sure it is in your community, too. When I went to the library on Friday to get the Journal Crossword puzzle, the kids who come in after school were there in a group at one of the tables. One young boy was coughing nonstop! He went to the drinking fountain and got a drink of water but that didn't stop his cough. He went back to the table and continued coughing.
I had two reactions to this. One was a feeling of compassion for the child, for how miserable it is to have to cough so long, and so hard. But another reaction, and probably the stronger of the two, was the one of concern about all those germs flying around, among all the other children, and the table and the books. I felt like I should be wearing a mask. I thought that I could have come in later and sat down at that table and not have any idea that a little boy had coughed all over it. How easy it is to pick up sickness germs in such a way.
I spoke to the librarian about this and she said that she would be wiping the table off after the children left.
My friend, the artist-librarian, came down sick with a sore throat and respitory illness last Saturday and she has been sick all week. She may not be able to go with me to church this morning although she's starting to feel better. She's really wrung out right now. Now I'm thinking that I know how she picked up the germs that made her sick.
Second Chance!
The moon was absolutely gorgeous tonight, and I saw it! No looking at the ground when I looked outside tonight. I made sure I looked for the moon. It was worth making the effort to see it.
Shoe
The Shoe cartoon today is one which I can relate to. Shoe's nephew remarks, "My dizzy dog! Every time the bell rings, he barks and runs to the door." I've mentioned before how my two dogs react to the ring of the doorbell or a knock at the door. They get all worked up.
Shoe asks, "So? What's wrong with that?" The nephew's answer, completely different than mine would be, is what makes this so funny. Forget about how annoying this behavior is and how difficult it makes it to answer the door. The answer is:
"Well, it's almost never for him." Teehee!
The Moon
I did remember to look at the moon last night. I'm assuming that it was much more beautiful the night before. Last night the moon was full but not bright. It looked like there was a veil of snow in front of it. It was still very pretty and I liked seeing it.
There's a lot of snow again this morning. It's coming down steadily. It seems that we've had snow here for a couple of weeks now. The neighborhood kids should enjoy sledding on the small hill by the school.
I'll be looking at the moon again tonight. It should still be a pretty sight.
Looking at My Feet
There's a Sesame Street song that says, "While looking at my feet at a crack in the sidewalk, an old tin can at the side of the road, I nearly missed a rainbow, I nearly missed a sunset, I nearly missed a shooting star going by."
That's evidently what happened to me last night. I wasn't really looking at my feet, but I was looking at the snow on the ground glittering like diamonds and I missed the MOON! This morning everyone was talking about how beautiful the moon was last night and I never saw it at all, just the diamonds in the snow. It was a gorgeous, full moon last night, I heard. The night was full of light! Evidently that's why the icy snow was glittering so much. I saw part of the beautiful sight, but I'm sorry I missed seeing the moon.
Tonight I shall make it a point to look for the moon!
Speak Softly and . . .
As I remember, it was Theodore Roosevelt that said, "Speak softly and carry a big stick." Yesterday I found that it's good to speak softly and take a person who knows what's going on along with you. I had to go back to a local brokerage to see about getting some things put into my name. When I went alone, I was told that there were a number of holdings and I should consolidate them to pay only one service fee, etc. Yesterday my friend went with me to make these final arrangements, --my friend who knows about these things. Suddenly everything was different in the way I was treated and what I was told. Apparently I was being set up to be sucked into, --well, not exactly a trap, but maybe something that was more to their interest than to mine. Now I know that a friend who knows the territory is more effective than a big stick.
Four Things
"Four things a man must learn to do
If he would make his record true;
To think without confusion clearly;
To love his fellow-men sincerely;
To act from honest motives purely;
To trust in God and heaven securely."
--Henry van Dyke
Snow Diamonds
I just looked out the front door at the snow scene. I knew it was misting snow earlier today but after the sun goes down, it's hard to tell what is really going on outside. But there in the light of the street lamps, I saw the snow glittering as though it's been strewn with handsful of diamonds. I've rarely seen the snow glittering like that in the night. Although it's powerfully beautiful, I do suspect it's really slippery out there tonight.
We Are the Same
I have been noticing, in my grief, that we, the human family, go through grief in the same way, fundamentally. Oh, there are degrees of grief and there are different ways of expressing it and coping with it, but ultimately, we do have the same thoughts about our loss and the same feelings of sorrow. Perhaps there is something within us that wants to consider that our own grief is different, --more than someone else's grief, perhaps. But I am finding out that we all tread the path of grief with the same step.
I visited a message board for widows and I was so impressed to read my own thoughts and words expressed by others. I discovered that I haven't had an original thought concerning my own mourning. These others were saying the exact same things that I had said or thought.
This morning's newspaper carries an article by Lenore Skomal which tells how hard it was for her to clear out her father's possessions from his home after his death. I found that her thoughts and emotions are exactly what mine are as I deal with what must be done about my husband's possessions.
She speaks of the desire to leave everything the way it was to help to "preserve the feel of him a wee bit longer." I know that feeling. She also says, "My father was more than just the sum of these things." I've felt that, too. My husband was so much more than the things which he's left behind. It's hard to dispose of things that he once valued even though they have no actual value.
She says that the things have lost their meaning now that he has gone. I feel that. I love this next sentence, "We were all looking for something that day --a piece of him. To this end we engaged in too much pack-ratery." Isn't that a wonderful word, pack-ratery. It's the pitfall that most of us can't avoid. It's the thing I am trying to guard against as I make decisions about what to keep, and what to dispose of. I've got to overcome my own tendencies to be a pack-rat.
Cycle of Days
I think I love how the days cycle through the week. Each day has its own significance, although some of them are special because they have no significant duty to be performed and I can pick and choose my own significance for the day.
This evening's significance hinges on tomorrow morning's activity, getting the trash out to the curb. I like this ritual, gathering up the used up odds and ends of junk and debris and expelling them from my domain. But every week, there's so much more that comes in to replace what I've discarded.
In the late afternoon or evening, I tie up the old newspapers and old magazines and surplus cardboard, --where does it all come from? Then early in the morning on Thursday, I make sure it all gets carried to the curb in good time for the trash pick up.
Swept and clean! How good that sounds. How good that feels. The discards are picked up on Thursday morning and it feels wonderful to be free of them.
On Thursday afternoon, the cycle begins again. More newspapers arrive, new arrivals pile up through each cycle of days till we reach another Wednesday afternoon and the good-bye-to-trash ritual begins again. There is a rhythm to this cycle of days.
Eat It Up
Today has been quite a day. I had both lunch and dinner with people and it was very nice. At noon my neighbor took me to the Lenten Luncheon which our area churches sponsor. It was a delicious meal of soup and sandwich and angel food cake for dessert. There was special music and an encouraging message about facing ourselves during this time of Lent.
Wednesday is always my day to have my friend Linda come for dinner. We had another good meal and a lot of good conversation. I cried a little, but I laughed some, too. It was good to have this time of blessing today.
Prayer
The other day I came across this prayer by Thomas Merton.
My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me, I cannot know for certain where it will end. . . .The fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. . .And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it. Therefore I will trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.
--Thoughts in Solitude
My heart echoes, I will trust You always, though I feel I am in the shadow of death, for You will never leave me to face my perils alone. How good to be reminded of those Scripture words from the 23rd Psalm and from Hebrews. What a precious promise.
Kindness
I have wept in the night
For the shortness of sight
That to somebody's need made me blind:
But I never have yet
Felt a tinge of regret
For being a little too kind.
--Author unknown
Groceries
I've been able to cut my grocery shopping to once a week. I went to Save-A-Lot again this morning. It wasn't crowded as it had been when I first went to their new location, but there were more people there than they used to have at the first location. The clerks who work there like the new location much better. There's a lot more room and the store seems airier and brighter. I just got perishables today, --milk, meat, produce. It amounted to just over $16. I can't say it was fun to shop this morning but I can say it wasn't half bad. I met a friend as I bagged my purchases and she reached out to me in sympathy. My friend at Aquarobics whose adult twins both died last summer told me that sometimes she can take sympathy and sometimes she can't. Today I got a little teary but didn't break down. And, I really do appreciate knowing that people are still thinking of me and praying for my needs. Now I have more busy work to do this afternoon.
Another Excerpt from Florida
That's Florida Scott-Maxwell, of course.
"My kitchen linoleum is so black and shiny that I waltz while I wait for the kettle to boil. This pleasure is for the old who live alone. The others must vanish into their expected role."
My kitchen floor isn't black and shiny but there have been times when I've danced with joy, --when I was alone.
Living Alone
Florida Pier Scott-Maxwell was born in 1883 and died in 1979. She married John Maxwell Scott-Maxwell. She was in her 80's when she kept a journal recording her thoughts and emotions about old age and living alone. This journal has become a little book titled, The Measure of My Days. This is one of the things she wrote about being alone.
"Another day to be filled, to be lived silently, watching the sky and the lights on the wall. No one will come probably. I have no duties except to myself. That is not true. I have a duty to all who care for me--not to be a problem, not to be a burden. I must carry my age lightly for all our sakes, and thank God I still can. Oh that I may to the end. Each day then, must be filled with my first duty, I must be 'all right'. But is this assurance not the gift we all give to each other daily, hourly?"
Pastor Moffett gave us a message on accountability. He said that all of us have an accountablity to someone else, besides God. He mentioned employers, supervisors, parents and children. At that time I felt that I had no longer any accountability to people because of my time of life. My children are grown and no longer live with me, so accountability is not an issue now. I'm retired and have no boss. But I want to be accountable to someone. Now I relate to Florida's thinking, that I have an accountability to those who love me, to take care of my well being to the best of my ability. When they ask, they want to know that I am still OK. I agree with this way of thinking.
How Come?
How come there are times when a cuppa tea tastes much better than at other times? I think I make it the same way each time but it isn't always the same to my taste. I just enjoyed a perfect cuppa tea at lunch today and I just wondered why it doesn't always taste the same. It may be something about me, about how much I'm ready for the tea. Maybe it's because of what I eat along with having that cuppa. Today I had a cheese and ham omelet and toast and butter with my tea. It was a simple lunch, but altogether, it was most pleasing.
The Brush Off
When I went to church this evening, I had to first clean the snow off the car. In the last hour or so before I had to leave, it had started to snow really vigorously and snow was thick over the whole car. When I was ready to get into the car, I looked down at my arms and saw that I had lots of snow on my coat. I started to brush it off with the brush I'd used on the windows of the car, and that motion triggered an old memory.
When my brother and I had been out playing in the snow, when we would go back indoors, if Dad was home, he would make us wait till he got the broom, and he would brush us down thoroughly, front, back, leggings, boots. Only then could we get into the kitchen and take off our snowsuits. Dad was always demanding about keeping the melting snow out of the house. It's been a long, long time since I've had that kind of brush off.
Garage Door Opener
Today's Arlo and Janis comic strip is making a joke based on how far away you can be and open your garage door, or unlock your car, with the electronic device. It reminds me:
We had an electronic garage door opener in the early '60s. One afternoon when I was home alone, I heard the garage door open. I thought Marlin was coming home, but when I checked, no one was there. I closed the door and went back upstairs. The door opened again. I think that several times the door was raised and lowered. I was puzzled and concerned.
When Marlin did come home a while later, I told him about this baffling malfunction of the automatic garage door. He knew the answer to this puzzle. He had been talking to the fellows at the firehall down the street from us. While he talked to them, he'd been punching the button on the remote door opener. The signal had carried that far, though he hadn't expected that it would.
A fun toy, --for sure.
First Grade Logic
One day when I was a substitute teacher at our local school in 1969, we teachers found first grader, Kirk, crying bitterly in the cafeteria. "Kevin kicked me," he responded to our inquiry. The first grade teacher had a long talk with Kevin then she brought both boys together in the hall.
"What should you say to Kirk?" she asked Kevin.
"I'm sorry, Kirk," he said obediently.
"I'm sorry, too, Kevin," Kirk replied.
"Why are you sorry, Kirk?" the teacher asked, trying not to show her surprise.
His answer had us all biting our lips to keep from laughing out loud.
"I hit him in the belly first," he said sadly.
Snow Scene
This picture shows the snowy scene outside my dining room window Wednesday morning. As snow melted, it fell from the branches in long bars which made interesting patterns in the untrampled snow underneath the tree.
A Honey of a Surprise
This morning at breakfast I felt in the mood to have a cuppa tea with honey. I got the new jar of honey out and started to open it when the words on the label caught my eye. It said "Sugar Free." How in the world can honey be sugar free? What happened here? What did I buy?
I was tricked again. I bought something I'd never heard of before, --imitation honey with zero net carbs! Ugh! That's never what I wanted.
I'm so disappointed. It's not honey. Even though it is close to the taste of honey, it isn't quite there. Now I wonder about putting this stuff into the peanut butter mixture that I fix for the squirrel and the birds. I think they need the real thing and not an imitation.
I was tricked into buying this stuff because I didn't know to beware of an imitation product. Now I know one more thing I have to be careful about when I'm grocery shopping. The trouble is, I probably have to be careful about everything these days. There's changes in many products.
Snow
We've had lots of snow falling in the last two days, but I haven't had to do any shoveling. The last time we had a steady snowfall, my neighbor was on vacation in Florida. Now he's home. He told me that when he's home, he'll take care of my driveway when he does his. He has a snowblower, so that makes it easier for him. He's been so good about keeping the driveway clear.
One of the busy things I did this afternoon was to make a raspberry cobbler, using some of the berries that I picked last summer. It turned out well. I took some of it to my neighbors as a small thank you for all the snow removal he's been doing for me. I hope they like it as much as I like my clear driveway.
Busy
Somehow I kept busy all day and yet I don't feel that I got very much done. I can tell more about the things I didn't do than I can about things I did do! And yet I do feel I've made some progress in sorting through boxes and folders.
I found an interesting picture of my husband with a mustache and he was holding a baby. I think it was my husband! I don't recognize the baby, and I don't remember him growing a mustache when it came in dark. He grew a mustache in 1970, perhaps, and it was salt and pepper color. His hair turned white early in his life. I don't recognize the surroundings in this picture and I don't remember the mustache at all. I'm finding little curiosities all the time.
On a Binge
Desy did it again. She is just driven to find food sometimes. Today while I went to Aquarobics, she nosed open the cupboard door and pulled out two boxes of instant chocolate pudding mix and one box of pearl tapioca. She ripped the boxes open and had chocolate powder over the floor, though she'd eaten as much as she could get. The pearl tapioca was scattered, too, but she didn't really want that! What a mess I had to clean up.
The cupboard doors don't latch. They just rest against the cupboard. I'll have to remember to put a chair solidly in front of the cupboard when I go out. I think she's extra hungry because of the medication she's taking for her allergies. I'm sorry she's so driven but I certainly don't want her to continue to raid the cupboard!
Apple Pie
At Thanksgiving, I felt so much joy as I baked apple and pumpkin pies. But my joy was touched with sadness when I discovered that my husband's lack of appetite turned into something much more serious and he was unable to eat much of anything, and certainly not pie.
Since I read that pumpkin pies could be frozen before they were baked but not after, I consumed the pumpkin pies, but I put some of the apple pie into the freezer. The other day I discovered that I still have two pieces of that pie there.
Today I had one piece of the apple pie for dessert and in spite of the sad connotation it holds, I found that it tasted very good. Tomorrow I shall have the second piece of pie. I'm trying to remember the joyful feeling and not the sadness, but I might say it's a bittersweet memory. However, the pie was good. I think I'm reflecting something of my dad, who always enjoyed having a piece of pie.
Paper Shredder
A couple of years ago when my husband was a member of the Secret Pals at church, his pal gave him a paper shredder. It tickled me that he seemed to get so much fun using it. The other day I brought it from his study upstairs and have it set up in the kitchen. Today when the mail came, I used it to shred the paper from the junk mail. It is fun to use it!
Nose to the Grindstone
Where did that phrase come from,--nose to the grindstone? That must really hurt. But, to me it just means that I've been keeping busy at a task which needs to be worked on.
This morning I was working on the church newsletter which I've volunteered to do again. Yesterday I thought I had one page completed, but the more I looked at it, the more I realized that it was not a good layout. It didn't have good balance. And then last night I saw in the evening paper that there was another death to mention in the sympathy column so I would have to rework that page for sure. I'm still learning the Publishing program process, so it's taking me longer than it should to do one page. However, I'm beginning to hone those skills and that's a plus.
Probably the biggest plus for me is that I've had to make a number of phone calls this morning. Talking to people throughout the morning has been really good for me. I need a reason to call someone, and this newsletter stuff gives me lots of reasons to call people.
Dithery
I outdithered myself tonight. I don't know how I do that, but I don't think it has much to do with the process of getting farther away from my birthday. I've done this kind of thing even when I was much younger. Here's what happened.
Carolyn and I went to church together this evening. She drives a white car, -don't ask me anything more about it. I only this minute realized that I really don't know what it is. She parked behind another white car and we even commented on the fact that she would rather have been able to pull forward into the front frow and be ready to drive right out instead of backing up.
After the service we walked to the car. I went to the passenger side, Carolyn to the driver's side. Some kids were being kids at a car a little distance away from us. I heard something about "old lady" and figured that they meant me and wondered how they would have missed learning that it would be rude to say that about me. And then someone called my name and I looked up to see who was calling me and what they wanted. I had the car door open and was starting to get into it. And then Carolyn said, "That's not my car!" It was Carolyn calling me, from the car that I had come to church in. What was I doing!!! I was getting into another car, completely unaware that Carolyn hadn't gotten into it and had walked on past it and was now getting into her own car and calling to me. Duh!
I felt really dithery, but we had a really good laugh together that I could do something that revealed how completely unaware I am of my surroundings. In spite of the fact that I really felt embarrassed, I knew it was hilarious. We drove home in gales of laughter. It did feel good to laugh.
Cable Guy
Last year some time, our local cable company made another improvement, switching channel numbers all around again. When they did that, it deeply affected my reception of the various channels. Now I can only watch certain channels through the VCR and the TV won't get them. And there are channels that I can only get on TV and the VCR won't pick them up, therefore I can't record anything from those channels.
Because I am timid and it's hard to make phone calls explaining such a thing, I just lived with the situation. Also, my husband didnt understand what was happening and he couldn't explain it.
My son called the cable people and set it up for them to come help me with the problem.
To make a long story short, he came today and the outcome is that since we got our TV in 1985, it's just too old to do the modern cable stuff. He couldn't believe the problem I have, though. Said he hadn't seen that problem anywhere else. He couldn't really understand what I meant till he actually worked with the set up himself. He ran a cord to his van and showed me how my signal is coming in correctly but the TV itself "has issues." So, I still can't record programs when I can't be home to watch them. And, I'll have to think of getting another TV in the far distant future, if I want to get back into modern culture again.
Morning Surprise
What a surprise awaited me when I looked out my window this morning. Yesterday was sunny and mild and snow was melting and big patches of lawn were showing up. I saw that the chives are beginning to push up through the garden mud and I felt excited about gardening prospects.
This morning, everything is touched with a frosting-like, clinging wet snow. There must be at least four inches of new fallen snow. The good things are that the temperature is still mild and that everything is really beautiful touched by this new snow. And, it's not going to last long.
Diversion
I had a pleasant diversion today. A friend from Columbus Church stopped in to spend a little time with me, and to invite me to the annual Friendship Dinner. I had thought that I'd go to it, but as the time approaches and I find that it's this Thursday night, I know I'm really not ready yet. There are too many memories there and I can't deal with them so publically. But we had a really nice chat and I was very pleased that she came.
This afternoon I had a lovely phone call, too. I am so grateful for these occasions when people reach out to me and help to lift me out of my loneliness. It really does help me.
Small progress
Isn't it funny how some small tasks actually take up loads of time? There were a couple of things that I did today that I thought would be routine, but that's not quite how it worked out. Neither of those things were finalized today, but at least I've got the chore started and with perseverance, I should get them finished successfully in the coming weeks.
Good news today is that the temperature climbed into the 40s and that feels wonderful. I got another close up look at my visiting red squirrel who has definitely become a pro at dining at the swinging blue bird feeder. She had to do amazing maneuvers to stay on the feeder that first day that I saw her there. Now, she has perfect balance and sways with the feeder, and she's very cool and collected about the whole deal.
I walked to the post office this afternoon, wearing a light jacket instead of a heavy winter coat. I was mailing a book that I'd just finished reading to the next name on the list. It was a nice day for a little walk.
Becoming Busy
This week I have a number of "must do" chores on my list and now I'm wondering if I've let myself become too busy, too fast. Today it's hard to decide which things are the most important, which things to get out of the way first. I never like to let things go till just before the deadline. I like to have them taken care of and out of the way early, in case I forget about them, or in case there are complications in getting them done which would make me miss my deadline.
There for a while I felt that I had no responsibilities at all and now I've taken on some tasks that make me wonder if I've taken on too much, too soon. I think, though, that with some organizing and with discipline, I'll manage to get these newly accepted tasks completed in good time.
Sugar Cookies
Guess what happened! My backdoor neighbor came over this evening and brought me some of her fresh baked, heart shaped sugar cookies. They are melt-in-your-mouth delicious! Even though my name wasn't written on them, I know exactly what Mary Lou is missing since she doesn't get to have her mom's sugar cookies for Valentine's Day.
I am so blessed!
First Valentine's Gift
I don't really remember just when Marlin and I started to date but it was some time before Christmas when we were both seniors in high school, at rival schools. We had met at church when our pastor's son invited him to come to our church. My dad and his mom lived on neighboring farms when they were kids so our parents had known each other but had not stayed in contact.
Marlin bought me a beautiful big heart shaped box of chocolate candy for our first Valentine's Day after we had been dating. I was not expecting a gift and hadn't even thought of getting him something. It was a beautiful surprise! I kept that lovely box for many years before I finally let it go, when it was probably tattered and worn.
As I recall, though, the following year, when I did expect a Valentine's gift, I didn't receive one. He kept me guessing! But basically, he did like to give me gifts. He didn't always know what I'd really like, but he did like to give me something.
He certainly started out right. I'm always glad to receive chocolate!
Valentines Day at School
When I was a school teacher, we had had three big party days to deal with during the school year. They were: Halloween, Christmas, and Valentine's Day. Most of us would rather teach classes than have parties at school. Kids get so excited about parties and it can affect the whole week, as well as the whole day. Try teaching grammar to kids thinking about party time.
I was very surprised to discover that Valentine's Day produced the most excitement of the three party days. I would have expected it to be Christmas, with the exchange of gifts. But, no, it was the exchange of Valentines. Kids would decorate their own shoe boxes or special envelope folders to receive the Valentines they would get from classmates. Sometimes they even visited other classrooms during lunch recess to deliver Valentines to friends in other classes, but mostly it was an exchange in their own class. When the cards were distributed, they spent a lot of time sorting through them and looking to see who had sent what.
For me the excitement of Valentine's Day at school was getting the chocolate candy! Valentine's Day also offered a reason to put up pretty room decorations.
Happy Valentine's Day, everyone,
And don't forget, --chocolates!
Missions Trip
Our evening church service was a report from the men who went on a missions trip to the Dominican Republic in January. It was a good service. Each of the men who participated told a little something about why they went, what they expected the experience to do for them and what it actually turned out to be. They all agreed that there is no way to really comprehend how poor people in this country really are. They wanted to give and give and give to the people. Their hearts were deeply touched and they came back filled with compassion. I was glad to hear their reports.
Levi, the youngest on the trip said, "You go to change the world, but the one who is changed is you." That seems to be the truth of the matter.
One Single Hour
Do you know how fast an hour goes by? The passage of time is relative, I know. It depends on how you're spending your time. If it's fun, time flies. If it's dull, times creeps.
My friend, Carolyn, and I have determined to have Sunday dinner together since both of us is alone and it's not nearly as much fun to eat alone as with a friend. One Sunday a month she has to take her turn working at the library. Today was the day. That gave us one hour between the time church was dismissed and when she would have to leave to be head for work.
I thought I had things well under control to get the noon meal quickly. But that hour flew so fast! She had to take the dessert with her in order to be there on time to open the library.
We did have a nice time together but it went by so quickly!
Cold, Bright, Brittle
How can it be so sunny outdoors and still be such a brittle cold? I really do know the answer to this. It's February and I live in Corry. The temperature is now 16 degrees, but the sun appears to be out in full strength and the whole morning looks beautiful. It's stopped snowing but there's plenty of snow all around. The snow reflects the sunshine and makes it dazzling. The houseplants at the windows perk up, basking in this increased amount of sunlight. The sunshine is good for all of us, --but it's still very cold out there!
More Sad Stories
These sad stories were written by my son. (John)
- Sad is a church that can't pay its bills.
- Sad is not having enough hours in your part of the day and not having enough work in your job's part of the day and not being able to swap.
- Sad is being so busy you don't get to read your letters on the day they come.
- Sad is a way of looking at life. That is SAD!
- Sad is buying something you need the week before it goes on sale.
- Sad is the Southern way of telling you what someone was talking about. . . . then he saad . . . .
- Sad is a chip in your favorite drinking glass.
- Sad is writing a poem that won't end right.
- Sad is staying up late trying to think of sad things.!
Sad Stories
In 1988 I asked my family and friends to tell me the answer to: What is sad? My daughter and her husband sent me these answers.
- Sad is being offered something wonderful to eat when you aren't hungry.
- Sad is being so cold during the night that you need to get up and get another blanket but you are too sleepy to get up and get one.
- Sad is being the last one to eat breakfast when there was leftover pizza in the refrigerator.
- Sad is a sold-out newspaper machine.
- Sad is a 50 cent coupon that expired yesterday.
- Sad is having the sun come out the day after your day off.
- Sad is waiting up to watch Mystery and finding the Fund Raiser instead.
- Sad is having a free baby sitter and being too tired to go out.
- Sad is having your baby sitter find a steady boyfriend.
- Sad is stumbling to the pantry on a dark cold morning to find that the Red Zinger is all gone.
- Sad is going to the Dental Center and finding out that the dentist is named Dr. Pain (Payne).
- Sad is thinking of something you want to tell someone and then remembering that they are dead.
Corrie ten Boom
In 1988 I read the book, The Five Silent Years of Corrie ten Boom, written by the person who took care of her at that time. In my notes, I wrote that Corrie had evidently had a stroke and couldn't speak during the last five years of her life but God continued to use her life and testimony even during that time. This book spoke to me about being content even in difficult places.
Before her stroke, Corrie had said, "My times are in God's hand; even the most difficut times are in His hand." I wrote that I needed to be reminded of this because I start feeling sorry for myself and I get to thinking that I'm on my own when times get difficult.
It was good for me to read these notes. I was thankful for the reminder in the tough times of 1988 and I'm thankful for the reminder for today, in the tough times of this month.
Crows Convene
When I went out onto the porch to pick up the morning newspaper, I heard the local crows convening with a loud mingling of voices. At other times I've heard them in the predawn in the tree in my backdoor's neighbor's tree. This morning they are in a tree closer to the school, on the other side of our house. I wonder if they convene somewhere every morning.
Humorous Misquotes
From The Worst of Everything, by Don Lessem:
Yogi Berra, the famous New York Yankee catcher, claims never to have said the following things widely attributed to him:
- "If you can't imitate him, don't copy him."
- When asked if he'd buy his kids an encyclopedia: "No, let them walk to school like I did."
- When asked, "Are you a fatalist?": "No, I never collected postage stamps."
- When asked about Mickey Mantle's switch-hitting: "Mantle was naturally amphibious."
- When told by a mayor's wife, "You look cool": "You don't look so hot yourself."
- When asked if he had see Doctor Zhivago: "No, I feel fine."
Work Well Done
We got a lot done today, tackling more of the many chores which wait my personal attention. Most of it was working with legal matters again, making phone calls, getting more things settled. I'm learning more and more how to work on these tasks which push me past my comfort zone.
Although the sun was shining today, the temperature remained well below freezing. But the promise of Spring is still there. It will come.
What a Beautiful Day
It's cold this morning and we still have lots of snow here in our area but the sun is shining brightly and it looks wonderful! It's a day to rejoice and be glad, something we should do every day, but it often seems more joyous when the sun is shining. Sunshine gives us a jumpstart for the day. It's so much harder to get up early when it's not daylight yet.
Tonight's Entertainment
I saw in the newspaper yesterday that our high school swim team would have a home meet tonight at 6. I thought it would be fun to go to it. My grandson and I went to the meet. It was my first time in a long time. I didn't really know the kids or even what the specific events were, but I knew I'd have a great time any how.
I looked for a good seat and the best one I found just happened to be by Wes, a friend from our church. He was a swimmer when he was in high school just over 30 years ago. He comes from a family of swimmers. His own children were strong swimmers. It was really great to be able to sit with him and his wife. He told me about various members of the swim team and even about some of the people on the opposing team, Harborcreek. It made the swim meet so much more enjoyable for me.
Our team didn't win but it was a really good meet. I loved seeing the swimmers. I'm really glad we went. I think my grandson feels that way, too.
Discipline
I've long felt the need for personal discipline but lately it seems as though I must exercise personal discipline many times every day. Wouldn't it be nice to get the unpleasant tasks out of the way early in the morning and then coast the rest of the day. But it seems that I no sooner get one impossible task faced down than another one arises. I should be getting used to doing these things soon. One thing I have learned, when I finish one of these unpleasant, impossible tasks, I feel really great. I feel like I've really accomplished something. I just wish the next one didn't pop up quite so soon.
A Book!
Today I got a book in the mail. It's a book that was written by one of the people who posted on one of the AOL Book Message boards with people like me who read a lot. One of the other readers offered to share the book with someone else after she was finished reading it. I quickly piped up, "Me! Me!" and I was first in line to read it next.
The book is Murder at Walden Pond by Al Blanchard. Susan sent the book to me with a list of others who asked to read it. I will send it to the next in line when I am finished. I love sharing the book this way.
In a sad note, I must add that Al Blanchard died very unexpectedly in November. Al added a lot to our message board and came across as kind, thoughtful and very witty. We loved reading his posts and I'm sure I'm going to enjoy reading his book.
Peaceful
I'm feeling more at peace with myself again tonight. I enjoyed the birthday celebration but I needed to get home again. There were many things to take care of for tomorrow. Right now, I just belong home.
My two dogs met me at the door and they were both very excited to see me. They think I'm a Queen. Their greeting makes me feel good. OK, my son greeted me at the door, too, and I was also happy for his greeting. It was good to be met at the door by the three of them.
And now I'm ready for bedtime. In fact, it's past my bedtime. Good-night!
A Job Well Done
When I got back from the birthday celebration today, my son took me to the cellar to show me the work that was done while I was away. Mr. Plumber and his son came back and hooked up the laundry tub to both the water supply and the drain. It works perfectly! I'm so pleased! I ran the water just to be able to use it, but so far I haven't had anything to wash there. But I will! And I'll love using it.
The Birthday
We had a very nice birthday celebration today. The meal was delicious and the birthday cake was outstanding, --chocolate with turtle icing. There were two choices of ice cream. Everything was delightful.
The birthday girl got lovely presents and to make it a little sweeter, not everything came in time, so she has a bit more to look forward to that's still on the way. I love to have birthday which just keep on going with some aspect of celebration for several days. I hope she'll love it, too.
The Eyes
I had my eye examination this afternoon. I've been thinking for some time now that perhaps my biggest problem with my eyes is that my glasses were not properly fitted to my eyes. If I push them way up and hold them there, I can see very well, but in their natural position, it just isn't right.
Dr. Z. told me that for sure that was the problem. The bifocal part was lined up too low. This time, I'm having the glasses made where I get my eyes examined. I've been promised a proper fit or they'll re-do it till they do it right. I'm pretty sure that they will get it right the first time.
I'm pleased that soon my eyes will feel right again.
Sweet Thirteen
Tomorrow is my granddaughter's birthday, 13. It's an exciting birthday. I am going to give her the necklace with a dainty amythyst pendant that her dad gave me years ago when he was still in high school and working on the crew of groundskeepers at the golf club in our town. I have loved having this necklace and I value it highly but it seems like this is the right time to give it to his first daughter, born in this amythyst month. If she reads this tonight, she'll know what to expect tomorrow. I think she won't read this till some time tomorrow.
For whenever she does read this, I say,
(And Many More!)
Rain Again
It was raining when I went to bed last night and I think it rained all night. It's still raining this morning. The snow has bravely endured the rain and is still there in great quantities. A big chunk of ice has come down from the porch roof and is laying on the path to the porch. Spring is definitely on the way even though it will probably take more than five weeks to arrive.
Income Tax
Today we made our first trip to the CPA about getting the income tax done. I'd already sent him the tax returns from the last two years so that he would know the kind of records my husband has kept and what to expect with this last year's information.
Today I took him the forms that have been sent to us through January and the early part of February. He checked everything over and told us that it looks like we have everything he needs to get started.
This is a big step for me. I've never been really involved with taxes.
Good to the Last Drip
We've had a very small drip under the sink for the last month or so. Since it was a very little drip, it wasn't an emergency. So we let it go. But finally, last Saturday, I called a plumber. He came this morning and in less than half an hour, he'd replaced the broken part, --a split sink nut. As it turns out, it was dripping more often than I realized. Since the sink nut was broken, the pressure in the pipes made it drip a little bit all of the time and I thought it was only when I was releasing water down the drain.
Now we've had that last drip, and that was good, too. Well, it's good to have that last drip GONE!
More Inspiring Words
I've been reading my journal from 1988. I had been reading Thomas Kelly's book, Testament of Devotion. I took these notes:
Kelly had to return to a position which he had held at Earlham College and he felt really bad about doing it. His decision to do so almost crushed him. He said, "I canot put into words what that letter cost me, but there is no use talking about it for there seems to be no other way."
That was in June. In August, he was back on top again. He wrote to a friend, "The calibre of a man is found in his ability to meet disappointment successfully, enriched rather than narrowed by it."
Reading this in 1988 gave me courage to face my return to school after enjoying my Sabbatical year. Reading these words again at this time of my life gives me courage to keep on doing what is necessary to do and to trust God to help me to continue to grow and be enriched in my life.
Something to Think About
This is an excerpt from Willie Stargell's autobiography, written by him with Tom Bird.
"I believe that each person is tested by struggle in their lives. It's how a person reacts to adversity that transforms them into what they are to become. Some persons fall prey to adversity. Some merely survive and some lift themselves to a higher level and overcome it."
I believe that this is really true.
Ragtag End of Snow
Today has been another warm day and the snow all around us continues to melt and run off. As it shrinks, it become ratty and disheveled. The lawn has become trampled terrain. The snow anywhere near the road is brown and dirty, as are the places where the snow plow piled up the extra snow. From now till Spring really does arrive, the ground will be a muddy mess and melting snow will reveal even more mess. Of course, there will be more snow between today and Spring, but for today, we are getting a taste of the muddy, sloppiness of Spring.
OK. Bring it on!
The New Shampoo
One of the things that Dr. Sue recommended that I do for Desy, because of her skin allergies, is to start using Nizoral shampoo for Desy's monthly bath. I could get it as a product for dogs or I could buy it from the shelf where people shampoos are sold. The product for dogs, she told me, is essential the same as for people but it costs a lot more. It's an antifungal shampoo and will help fight the bacteria on her skin. It also smells nice.
I bathed her with the new shampoo this morning. Her fur looks really nice. I hope it helps. She was still scratching her itches afterward, though.
Practice Makes Perfect
When I first saw the squirrel at the new blue bird feeder, I was very amused at how he ran around the bottom circle of it and also spent a lot of time brushing the snow off the top. I don't think he was really meaning to brush off the snow. I think he was looking for a way to get to the contents. When he found the seed, he still had a lot of trouble controlling the swing of feeder and hanging on.
Today I got to see him there again. He's got it down pat now! He was a pro. It was fun to watch him helping himself. I was glad to have him eating there because the birds haven't been visiting much.
A Warmer Day
Some of my friends from other states, other places, have been writing to me about their sunny day today and how nice it is outdoors. I can report that we had sun today, too, and it was really warm outdoors, but we still have tons of snow all around. We had to spend some time today doing serious snow removal from the used-to-be-back-porch area. I shoveled snow off the side porch, too.
The ice and snow is melting, though. We just want it to go away slowly and not cause problems with flooding.
The Party
Today was the really big party for Norm and Norma to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. I knew it would be hard for me to be there but I really wanted to try to go for a little while. I had been asked to prepare a quilt block for their memory quilt and I really wanted to see the quilt. I also wanted to meet their daughter, who had invited me to contribute to the quilt and we'd exchanged some e-mails about it.
It was a glorious party and I really do think it was all that the happy couple could have wanted. The weather was wonderful. I loved the quilt. I loved seeing them look so happy.
But alas, I couldn't keep from bawling and I knew I really couldn't stay. I hated to be a drag on such a happy occasion, but I'm sure that everyone who knew that Marlin and I were so close to 50 and didn't make it understood why I had to cry. It's still too soon for me to be able to handle it.
However, I'm so happy for Norm and Norma and I wish them much happiness in their future.
More Vet Stuff
After the man and woman with the nasty dog left the waiting room, another couple came in with a very tiny dog. They were both really big people and they had their tiny dog dressed in a sweater and wrapped in a blanket. After they got seated in the waiting room, they looked at Rusty and the woman said in an awed voice that Rusty's head was bigger than her dog. It was true.
The girls who work for Dr. Sue were very happy to see and help this little dog. First they took him to be weighed and came back and said that he now weighs three and a half pounds.
The little dog was very nervous about being there but he received the most gentle care. Karen, the attendant, cuddled him in his blanket as she took him back for his shot. Then she held him while they settled the bill and she seemed reluctant to hand him back to his people when they left.
I wonder if that little dog ever gets to walk. He was held constantly the whole time he was there. They might be afraid he would get stepped on!
Rusty and Desy Visit the Vet
My son helped me get Rusty and Desy to the vet today for their check up and necessary shots. I wish I could hear Rusty's version of what happened. We just got into the waiting room and a man and woman were settling the bill for their small dog which the man was holding in his arms. My son sat down in a chair and Rusty and Desy sat on the floor in front of him. The woman was telling me that the cat in the cage on the other side of the room had the same name that she was called when she was a teenager. I asked what that name was and she started to tell me when there was an outbreaking of intense barking behind us.
The man had taken his little dog, Pepper, over to my son and pushed his dog right at Rusty. Pepper bit Rusty right on the nose! When I got there, big drops of blood were dripping over the floor. Rusty hadn't barked or reacted! Pepper was barking.
The man and woman kept telling us that their dog had NEVER done anything like that before. But they didn't leave. They just kept standing there close with that nasty little dog! However, Rusty was very well behaved. He could have killed that dog with one well placed bite!
I went to find something to clean up the blood and came back with a roll of paper towels and an old towel. Finally the people left, still insisting that their dog had NEVER done that, EVER. First time.
And then the receptionist told us that she had just asked the people to get that dog away from her because she didn't trust the dog. "It's not socialized," she told us. She thought the dog was a real menance. And then when we got to see Dr. Sue, she told us that the dog had lunged and snapped at her three times! She said she'd just warned those people that they need to discipline that dog and not let him act like that. She said the woman had bite marks along her arm where the dog has been biting her!!! She said it's a really nasty animal but those people won't listen. This is actually scary because you just know that someday this dog is going to nail a child. Why would anyone keep a dog who bites them?
But back to Rusty. He was so well behaved! He got his toenails clipped, his temperature taken, a couple of shots, and though he didn't really like it, he was OK with it. When she was patting him down to make sure he had no ruptures, Rusty let her know that he was uncomfortable with that treatment but he didn't try to stop her. I was very pleased with his behavior.
Desy needed some serious help with her allergy problem. We're going to do what Dr. Sue calls "pulsing." That is to give her short bursts of steroid to help her to have relief from the constant itching. Desy needed two shots which seemed to hurt her this time. She too objected to this treatment, but she didn't try to harm the doctor either.
They are good kids, these two! I'm still shaking my head over that biting dog incident. I'm glad that I wasnt' trying to handle them both by myself when that incident occurred.
By the way, I found out later that the woman's nickname had been Tootsie.
Cleanliness Is:
I have such a good feeling about this morning's work. Since I have family here to help me today, I had the boys pull the refrigerator away from the wall and I was able to clean behind it. Isn't it weird how dirty it gets in back of and in under the refrigerator? It's been quite a while since I was able to clean there.
When I finished with the refrigerator, I had them pull out the stove and I got that all cleaned up, too. Where does that dirt come from? I can't see under or behind these appliances but I really like knowing that it is clean there now.
Baking Again
Since I'm having family come this evening, I decided that I ought to have cookies to welcome them. Late this afternoon, I baked cookies, my favorite, --the Canterbury Jumbles from a Diane Mott Davidson recipe. They are basically a chocolate chip cookie but have more good things, like coconut, nuts and raisins. I've made them for the family before so I know they will be enjoyed.
While I baked, I thought about how this morning I was reading over my journal from the last three months. I decided that it was a bittersweet experience with more comfort in it than unhappiness, though the whole thing was about a very sad time. But in that sad time, I could see myself reaching out in hope, doing all I knew to do, giving as much as I could give. Reading it made me feel close to him again in some way. It made me feel better about myself, too. It seemed like I was reading a book that I'd read before and I'll want to read again. I know that seems strange. I don't fully understand it myself, but that's the feeling it gave me.
The cookies turned out exactly right, she said modestly!
Journal Thoughts
The morning snow didn't amount to anything. It dusted everything over and then melted so the roads and vehicles are clear again.
I spent the morning printing my journal from last year, just from October to the end of the year. I've been writing it on the computer instead of in my notebook, but then I got really busy with what was going on here and didn't print it for the last three months.
I did some proofreading before printing and I was so torn to read all the hard things I had gone through in the last three months of the year. How scared I was for my husband and yet how often I grasped at hope. I did put a lot of my thoughts and feeling into it, so if I ever decide to write a book or article on such grief, I'll have a pretty good record of how much it hurts.
So, I've cried some again today, but it's just a sad cry, not a real jagged, I-can't-stand-it cry. In a way, it was another step in healing. Looking back at the record, I can see more clearly now than I could then how sick he really was and how much we tried to get help for him. I can see how friends, neighbors and family all showed him love and I take comfort in that.
And now the pages are printed and I can get them in the binder and put them away till I'm ready to reread them at some future date. Writing the journal has been very helpful to me.
Feeling Good
I have a really good feeling about yesterday and this morning. I have done a few more things that were very hard for me to do but I am now successfully past those tasks. And I had such a nice day with my friends.
This evening my son and his family are coming and tomorrow I will have help in taking Rusty and Desy to the vet for their shots.
The trash collection went early this morning, but I had the trash out in plenty of time.
Wasn't it wonderful that no one was killed in that corporate jet crash yesterday morning! We need to hear good news like that.
It's snowing here this morning. Wonder how much it's going to snow. It's snowing in earnest right now, but it might not snow for long. We don't need more snow yet We still have most of the snow from a couple weeks ago.
Dinner
Dinner tonight was very good but we had lots of left overs. Three women don't eat as much as one family. The Waldorf Salad was very good. When my husband and Stephen were both at dinner and I made that salad, it didn't matter how much I made, I never had any left over. It was always eaten up. They both really liked the Waldorf Salad.
Erie Excursion
It was a really nice day to travel to Erie. The roads were bare and dry and the temperature was mild. We had no trouble finding the Social Security office and I only had to wait about 20 minutes for my turn. It probably took about 10 minutes for the clerk to copy my marriage certificate. She fussed with that copier for quite a long time. I don't know why it took so long.
How light hearted I felt as we left that office. That chore had hung over me for several weeks. I knew it had to be done but felt unable to tackle the travel alone. I'm so thankful that my friend made the trip with me.
Plans
Today Carolyn and I are going to Erie together. I woke up early because I was thinking about the things I should do to get ready in time.
I think last evening was the first one that went easily and smoothly for me. Evenings are very hard as rule but last night I was baking a chocolate oat snack cake and cutting up apples for Waldorf Salad. I really do enjoy cooking and baking but there's very little point in baking for just me. However, I'm having company for dinner this afternoon and some of my family is coming for over the weekend, so I have a good reason to bake. It kept me happily busy all evening.
Refills
Today I mixed up the peanut butter stuff to refill the critter log. It was a lovely warm day so it was easy for me to spend some time outdoors filling up the holes in the hanging log. I was so surprised to find that those holes have been chewed and pecked to a fare-thee-well. (That's an old expression which I think means, in this case, a great amount.) Many of the holes are greatly enlarged. I was glad that I had mixed up a bigger quantity this time.
I wonder if the woodpeckers and squirrels will whittle that log into toothpicks in a couple of years! I'm happy that they are getting good use of it.
The Ordinary Can Be a Victory
Today I did the kinds of things that most people do every day without thinking of them as any big deal but for me it was a big thing. I called our lawyer about a legal matter which I didn't understand and within the hour the staff took steps to have it worked out. It saved me from a trip to the courthouse in Erie, which would have been a terrible mistake if I'd gone there.
And, I paid the Water, Sewer, Refuse bill in the city building, and also got the dogs' license tags for this year. Small things, big victories.
My husband, as you must have guessed, always did those things. He always bought the licenses as soon as he was sure they were ready to sell them at the city building. In fact, some times, he went to buy them before they had the new ones ready. Then he made it a production with the dogs to put their new tags on their collars. I hope I can make it feel special to get their new tags on the collars. We do love our puppies!
Morning
What a beautiful morning it is here! Even though it's quite cold here today, it seems that nature is shouting, "Spring is on the way!" The sun is shining beautifully. The trees and other outdoor things cast long shadows toward the west and where the sun touches the still deep snow, it sparkles. The seed spill has been scattered around on the ground and I still haven't been out to check to see if the feeder is completely empty.
I threw my apple peels out on the front lawn (which is actually all snow right now) yesterday, so the deer could get them. But they are still there this morning. I think the deer didn't go through there last night.
I'm happy to have work to do this morning. I shall keep busy.
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